Thursday, March 09, 2006

It's A Watercooler Hate

...You go to get a glass of water from the watercooler, see that it's empty, then walk away. Replacing the water is just too much work for you isn't it? You'd rather die of thirst than lift a finger you don't have to. Just leave it, go ahead then I can hate you.

...You go to replace the water at the watercooler and spill half of it all over the floor. Use your arms much? No of course you don't. 20 pounds is pretty heavy, I mean who can actually lift that to their waist, so tough and so hated.

...You actually speak about TV shows at the watercooler. You're life is just so interesting that you can only speak about TV shows that you saw, original thoughts? Nope. Creative ideas? Nope. Hated by me? Indeed.

...You refer to a show as a "watercooler show". Why think for yourself when someone can just give you buzzwords to make you sound like you actually have something to say, when in reality you just regurgitate crap that people spew in the news and on E!. Your version of the "news" is in fact E! and Entertainment Tonight and Access Hollywood and ihateyouif.

...You have a water bottle you use at the watercooler over and over and over again. Contrary to your belief, that mold inside your water bottle is not good for you, it's repulsive, just like your face. There are paper cups everywhere, use one of those or be hated.

...You are refilling your mold infested waterbottle at the watercooler and place the rim of the waterbottle right up against the spicket or whatever it's called, thereby contaminating any water that is drawn in the future. Do you have any ounce of brain power in the mouse size head of yours? Your filthy germs are now all over the place, the entire office is now sick and you are now hated.


Anonymous said...

Sick and spreading oral herpes. These people have HERPES

elvira black said...

Glad you see you're still in prime hating mode!

Doofi said...

as they in the biz, the hate must go on