Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Oh Hate, Where Art Thou?

…You show up in more places than waldo. No matter where I am, you somehow just appear, what is it with you? Do you stalk me? Why couldn’t it be some hot girl that shows up everywhere I go? Nooooo, it has to be you and it has to be hate.

…You wipe back to front. Luckily, I do not have the misfortune of having to witness such behaviour, but knowing that people do this troubles me, hearing that 60% of people wipe this way is even more troubling, you wipe front to back, then you thuroughly wash with a wet wipe, it’s called hygene, but no we have people out there too lazy to clean properly and too lazy to not be hated.

…You wear clothes that are walking billboards. Why do people feel like offering free advertising for Nike and adidas. What kind of fool do you have to be to fall for that, oh look at me, look at what I’m wearing. You obviously have a simple mind and are so easily influenced that you would actually hate yourself, kind of how I hate you.

…You set up a computer so that it says, your password will expire in 15 days do you want to change it now? Now? Wouldn’t it serve a better purpose to say, your password changes in 1 hour do you want to change it? Or how about, your password expired, change it. If people are changing it at the suggested 15 minute timeframe, after a couple of rounds your password lasts about a week. I’ll let you all know my password, ihateyouif123456789.

…You see me take an AMNY from the guy standing right next to you and then shove a Metro in my face. I appreciate the free paper, but seriously they’re both like 10 pages and say the same thing, but amny was here first, then you metro people decided to copy for some reason, I guess you felt there just wasn’t enough stupid things in the world. I guess you felt you weren’t hated enough in the world.

…You are the pizza guy in the cafeteria that before putting the slice in the oven to heat it, asks, to stay or go. I say, stay. 2 minutes later the slice is ready and I get the question, to stay or go? Why did you ask me in the first place slicey? What was the point? You know you have no memory beyond 9 seconds, kind of like how you can't go 9 seconds without getting hated by me.

1 comment:

jessie said...

glad to see you're still at it! funny stuff.