Thursday, September 27, 2007

Hate's the boss

...You show up at my office like clockwork everyday at 1130 and then again at 2. Talk about absolute worst with timing. Have you ever dealt with people before? No of course not, that’s why your 40 and single. You see, 11:30 is right before lunch, people kinda want to finish up what they were doing and not deal with people until they get their lunch. At 2:00 the food coma sets in, people want a few minutes (read: an hour) to veg at their desk, surf a little internets, do some mindless work and then hate you.

...You hire someone to replace my old boss, but take 1.5 years to do so. So for the past year and a half, I’ve been doing the job of two, I’ve been doing all the work, doing all the presentations and getting all the credit. Now you bring in some jamoke that knows about a fraction of what I know, but makes at least twice as much as me. You hire this tool to just sit in his office, probably blogging about how he has this great job where he’s overpaid and some kid is doing all his work and giving him all his hate.

...You are my new boss (in title only) and when meetings are scheduled in the morning, you show up literally 30 seconds before. For an 8 AM meeting you show up at 7:59:30. yes that leaves 30 seconds to prepare, not to mention you had no involvement whatsoever in the preparation for the meeting, you didn’t ask me to give you any update on topics for the meeting so naturally you are going sit there like a useless pile, while I run the meeting. You do realize that you are being watched through a magnifying glass, if you can not show more value than me, then you will be shown hate.

...You concede the lead in a meeting that you are supposed to be leading to the guy 15 years younger than you and sit silently in the corner like the dunce that you are. You interject once in the meeting at the most inopportune time saying nothing of value or relevance, you are then given a look of death followed by a look of pity at which point I jump in to save your ass, but I most certainly do not save my hate.

...You have nothing to say so you begin a sentence as though you are about to make a point, then about halfway through the sentence, you fade out and then pause for someone else to interject and say something that might be meaningful. Once someone says something, you confirm it by saying, “right” or “exactly”. You think that people don’t notice this but they do, they know you are useless and they know you are hated.

...You are my new boss and have the same last name as me. Not only are you a complete waste of space, but you have the same last name as me and we're not in IT. I’ve worked very hard to make a name for myself and all you’re doing is tearing that apart. The most value you have added is responding to everyone’s stupid jokes about us having the same last name and you can’t even get that right, you can only get hate.

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